Love Story #1

by Lieza

He’s a charming guy who’s already in his 40s, super funny, chubby—okay, horizontally challenged, and is loved by everyone in the office.

He’s my boss’ boss.

It was my first time to have a chat with him about something that isn’t work related.

He told me about he and his wife’s story.

J was an introvert, his wife. He said she’s not the type who’ll mingle or would want to meet new friends. She was always too shy at parties. She was his best friend, and they had the same circle of friends.

“I broke up with her—minundo nya ako eh (her world revolved around me).”
“Ang gwapo mo naman boss!” I said. (blah blah...)

“I went to Paris, and got myself a new girlfriend. I started to like this new girl I was with.”

When he got back from Paris, he found out that his friend had set up his J with another guy.

“Nalaman ko, gwapo, mayaman…matalino...” (I found out he was handsome, rich, intelligent...) So he decided to get J back.

He tried so hard to break up with his then girlfriend. Gave her the lamest excuses a man could ever tell his girlfriend:

“It’s not you, it’s me.”
“My dad’s sick and I won’t have time for you…”
“I love you this much (gestures a measure of an inch with his right thumb and index finger), and you love me this much (gestures a measure of 5 inch with his opposite fingers)…See? Biiiiig difference!”

But his then girlfriend tried to understand him. She said it was ok, and that she’ll stay no matter what. She sends him flowers and chocolates, as if she was courting him. She even got hospitalized for severe depression.

His birthday came, and he decided to throw a party. He didn’t invite his then girlfriend, and told her that there won’t be a celebration. Little did she know that aside from his friends who were all present in their house that day, J was there.

Phone rings during the party…
Him: Hello?
Ex: Hi, anong meron senyo? (what’s going on in your place?)
Him: Uhhhhm…may konting gathering dito.. (there’s a small gathering)
Ex: Ahh. Why wasn’t I invited?
Him: Uhmmm…si J nandito.. (J’s here)

Tooooooooot.

“Ayun, binalikan ko si J,” (So there, I went back to J!) he told me with a smile on his face.

“Tsaka may putok kasi yung ex kong yun eh!” (also, my ex’s got a terrible body odor!)

Then my boss arrived as if he was on cue, “Ah! Meron ding akong ex na ganyan! Puta!”

Men. ;P