by Pat Balo
1) “Pare, ang pogi mo.”– It doesn’t really matter is the person saying this is gay or straight. For as long as the object of the statement is straight, this is a definite no-no. Why? Because boys have wildly malicious minds and egos the size of Luzon, which is why they assume that no one (not girls, not gays, not even other men) can resist their charms.
2) “Tol, jackpot ka sa girlfriend mo ah.” – What this statement actually means is that the guy looks like his girlfriend’s alalay and you just can’t figure out paano niya naloko yung babae (how he was able to fool her).
3) “Liit ah.” – You better be hoping that a) you aren’t in the bathroom taking a leak or b) you aren’t the object of this conversation. If you are, then you are honor-bound to stage the “Rumble in the Bathroom” for your officemates.
Showing posts with label boys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boys. Show all posts
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Top 3 Things Boys Shouldn’t Say to Girls
by Carrie
1. “I think about you all the time” – This statement, at the very least, is an exaggeration of a man’s capability to focus his thoughts on a single thing at a time. No offense meant there, just that when directed to a girl (please note that I will not use the word “woman” here), specially if the girl is so smitten she will believe anything, this statement can be fatal to both parties and can lead to migraines and little moments of death. Girls tend to take your word for it, and when this statement is uttered, better be ready to support it with action and a response to every single text message she sends you from dusk ‘til dawn.
2. “You’re too emotional” – Girls. Venting. Venting. Girls. They go together. When girls talk about a shitty day in the office and how they’d love to kill this smart-alecky new girl who made a snotty remark about the clothes she was wearing, just listen. Offer some consolation. Telling her she is “being too emotional” translates to “you don’t care”. Girls love to go mushy about a lot of things and most times they are just excuses for you to say the things she wants to hear so she’ll feel better.
3. “I love you” – the rule is, don’t say it unless you mean it. Love has become the generic term men use to achieve a variety of objectives. Love/loving is the high ground, people. And it is a level that is definitely not there yet on your 1st monthsary. It is more realistic to say “I’m in love with you”. Believe you me, she will recount the story of what you said to 12 of her friends and they will dissect it to death including how you said, when and where. 10 hours and two bottles of vodka later, one of the 12 will hopefully have the wisdom to make her understand what ‘in love with you means”. 6 months after and you break up, you both can truthfully say when asked why: “we were not in love anymore”.
1. “I think about you all the time” – This statement, at the very least, is an exaggeration of a man’s capability to focus his thoughts on a single thing at a time. No offense meant there, just that when directed to a girl (please note that I will not use the word “woman” here), specially if the girl is so smitten she will believe anything, this statement can be fatal to both parties and can lead to migraines and little moments of death. Girls tend to take your word for it, and when this statement is uttered, better be ready to support it with action and a response to every single text message she sends you from dusk ‘til dawn.
2. “You’re too emotional” – Girls. Venting. Venting. Girls. They go together. When girls talk about a shitty day in the office and how they’d love to kill this smart-alecky new girl who made a snotty remark about the clothes she was wearing, just listen. Offer some consolation. Telling her she is “being too emotional” translates to “you don’t care”. Girls love to go mushy about a lot of things and most times they are just excuses for you to say the things she wants to hear so she’ll feel better.
3. “I love you” – the rule is, don’t say it unless you mean it. Love has become the generic term men use to achieve a variety of objectives. Love/loving is the high ground, people. And it is a level that is definitely not there yet on your 1st monthsary. It is more realistic to say “I’m in love with you”. Believe you me, she will recount the story of what you said to 12 of her friends and they will dissect it to death including how you said, when and where. 10 hours and two bottles of vodka later, one of the 12 will hopefully have the wisdom to make her understand what ‘in love with you means”. 6 months after and you break up, you both can truthfully say when asked why: “we were not in love anymore”.
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